Hands Full of Glitter and Tofu : 2011 Day 261 - IKEA gods

A gorgeous sleep in then I chilled on the couch watching Wacky Races (which I hadn't seen in years) and reading Saturday's Herald while Steve called his mum and dad to see how she was after she fell and broke her arm on the previous Thursday (she is OK but uncomfortable and quiet immobile)

Then we attacked the IKEA Besta unit aiming to get it finished once and for all!

The drawers were done the day before and lie ready for insertion into the Besta (think they're called Inreda)

I am now a dab hand at screwing things in (no jokes please of the innuendi variety, though they would be fun), having been schooled by my gorgeous guy in the proper technique

Yeah man! We're building IKEA things!

The finished item with the TV and stereo in place (blue plastic film is to protect the white gloss look of the shelves)

....and finally, the It Gets Better video has been publicised by Same Same, a major gay website and yours truly made the page. Not the best photo granted but then my personal vanity isn't the issue, and saving LGBTI kids lives is, so any publicity is wonderful!

Hands Full of Glitter and Tofu : 2011 Day 259 - Big Day! Relaxed Night...

BIG DAY on campus my friends!!

The video that I was filmed for, and appear extensively in, has just gone live on the net, and I couldn't be more proud of the brave people who appear with me, and the fact that I got to participate in something that means so much to me.

If it just saves one life, it will be totally worth it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0b8RnlpuJXo

We also made it onto the Herald-Sun's website which is exciting (and amazing given it's a Murdoch publication!)

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/more-news/optus-it-gets-better-video-thought-to-be-an-australian-first/story-fn7x8me2-1226138916720

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Artwork on the street

I went out walking this morning, despite how tired I was (mainly because it does refresh me and makes my work days that much more bouncy and productive...plus I ate Thai last night!), and found this adorable piece of stuck on art work on the brick walls of the railway underpass on Coulson Street. These pieces never last long, thanks to passing vandals and snails, so like many pieces before it, I have photographed it to preserve it for posterity since one of the things I LOVE about Erskineville is that fact that, gentrified or not, it still has a loveably unkempt charm about it....

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Bye Bye Ngaire (pron Ny-ree)


One of the joys of the last few years has been getting to know my cousin Ngaire (pictured below with her sister, Moirag) far better than I did growing up (my Dad, fostered at a young age and bounced between relatives wasn't especially close to his family for quite some time, meaning we mostly saw my mum's side of the family). Our catch ups are always fun, and full of laughter and intelligent conversation, and she is also one of the loveliest people I have ever met into the bargain.


Sad part now is, although it is an awesome step forward for her, is that she is leaving Sydney for 12 months to work in a school in Arusha, Tanzania, that caters to young adults who would otherwise not be able to afford to go to secondary school. It is an inspiring endeavour, and I am so proud of Ngaire for wanting to be a part of it. To send her off, she organised for work and uni friends, and family to have drinks and pizza with her at The Roxy in Parramatta. While the music was crazy loud - loved the songs but we were right near the speakers which made talking a challenge at times! - the vibe was fun, food awesome, and I also got to meet her wonderful friends, and get to know my cousin, Moirag, and her partner, Pam, a whole lot better. We also got to ride out to Parramatta and back (my gorgeous guy's old work location from years back), which was fun, especially on the way back with some of the crazy and harmless people who get trains late at night.

Pizza and wine (which thanks to a ditzy barmaid came in a champagne flute at one point)

My gorgeous guy and I

Me, Ngaire and my gorgeous guy

Fun with Instagram 1

Fun with Instagram 2 (on the train home from Parramatta)

Fun with Instagram 3 (also on the train)

Redfern station very late at night - thanks to Instagram again

Hands Full of Glitter and Tofu : 2011 Day 258 (Thursday 15 September) - On the Road (Show) Again

An early mark of sorts today to attend a roadshow - major division wide presentation - of the division that was behind the It Gets Better video. The event was held at The Big Top @ Luna Park (Sydney), from which the views are amazing, and was unlike anything my division can afford to do - multimedia, blaring rock music, waitered drinks and canapes afterwards - and most importantly the public preview of the video which really seemed to affect a number of people. I was there with my new work friend, Brett, a 22 year bright extrovert who is also in the video and a really lovely guy.

It was such a good afternoon in fact that it was totally worth the mad frantic morning of manic work from 7.30 - 1 that preceded it.

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Followed it up that night with dinner with my wonderful friend, Waz @ Stir Crazy Thai. Yum food, lovely cool but pleasant evening (so we sat outside), and a great conversation.... perfect end to an amazing day.

Hands Full of Glitter and Tofu : 2011 Day 242 - Private Viewing of the It Gets Better video

Today is the day I get to view the completed video and I am nervous, and excited all at once.

Nervous because I have no idea how what I said will come across, and if I will be comfortable seeing it (which is odd since very little makes me truly nervous these days but it makes sense I guess since what I am sharing is so personal, and it will splashed across the internet for all to see), and because I am meeting all the other people who contributed their life stories (we were filmed separately so I didn't see them then) for the first time at the same time as I am hearing them share such deep personal stuff. It's the complete reversal of social norms, and should prove very interesting. It is possible we will bond instantly after watching it.

Excited because if there's one cause I champion, and truly believe in, it's this one. I was told for years I was worthless, perverted, immoral etc simply because I was gay, and teased on soul-excoriating scale at the same time, and while I didn't contemplate suicide, I constantly hated myself, and felt I had failed in some way to live up to expected norms. Coming out freed me from this, and released to be who I truly am (and find the love of my life) and I want to celebrate that, and underscore to teenagers under the harsh glare of merciless judgement, that life does get better. It isn't ajust a slogan; it's very real.

Can't wait for 2.30 and the viewing....

Well I have viewed the video along with all the Sydney based contributors (some of the people involved were in Melbourne) and I am in awe of the powerful, amazing things my fellow contributors had to say! It was a privilege to hear them share so many truly special parts of their lives, both the good and bad, as we all stood together watching the short video ( it's about 7 minutes or so in length). I ended up featuring quite a bit which surprised me, not because I don't think that what I shared had value but because everyone else really shared deeply of themselves too.


The video goes live in about a month and I think it will be one of the proudest days of my life to be a part of something that matters so much to me and I can only hope that our small contribution touches some lives somewhere and reminds everyone that it does get better!

Hands Full of Glitter and Tofu : 2011 Day 229 (Wednesday 17 August) - Its Gets Better....SMILE!

What an emotional day.

I started work very early....

...on a sick day I was taking so I could get the last of the root canal surgery done (more on that later), so I coulod cram an hour's work in between 7.20 and 8.20 and then dash across campus for a very important task, something I passionately and wholeheartedly believe in - filming of my part in the It Gets Better project contribution by Optus, the company I work for.

It Gets Better was started about a year ago by a couple in the USA, Dan Savage and his husband, Terry Miller, in response to a rash of suicides by LGBT youth. While they couldn't gain direct access to high schools, what they could do was post a video talking about they had gone through hell as teenagers, but that life had got better for them. It didn't sugarcoat things, and portray their lives as endless fountains of joy and happiness, and therein lay its success. It was a real impassioned plea to these kids to hold on, that even though life can unimaginably cruel and tough when you're growing up, and grappling with your sexuality while other kids taunt you, that it does get better as an adult, and that you can let the small minded bigots and bullies rob you of what will be a rich, rewarding future.

Terry Miller (left) and Dan Savage (right)

As someone who had grown up being mercilessly teased at school, and being told repeatedly the church that I was perverse, dirty and sleazy (which caused such unbridled panic in me that I repressed my sexuality till I came out at 37), I can totally relate to the feeling that as a gay teenager, you're locked away in a suffocating bubble that allows no air in or out, and so darkens the future that the only choices are falling so deep into yourself that no one ever sees the real you (which kills you bit by bit), or killing yourself. I went with the former, but I could understand why kids feel there is so little hope that they need to end it all.

But as a man who finally came out, discovered how creative and outrageous I can be, made a ton of warm, supportive friends, and finally, and most deliriously, wonderfully, met a gorgeous man who has made my life so amazingly rich, fulfilling and unloved that I still can't believe I have met the love of my life and soul mate, I am living proof that it does get better. Amazingly fantastically better in ways that never crossed my mind during my years in the church where I was told I was diseased and wrong, or the years at school when kids made me feel lower than low, and it grieves me to think that anyone would end their lives before seeing the changes that will come, as surely as day follows night. I know how awful the teenage years can be, I know it intimately well, but I also know it is possible to survive it, and come out the other end not only intact but thriving.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iWYqsaJk_U8  (Apple)


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYLs4NCgvNU  (Google)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPg02qjL40g&feature=related  (Facebook)

I am so excited that I got a chance to record this piece for the Optus contribution, and the guy at Optus organising this managed to get the camera man in early so I could get filmed, then dash into the City for my root canal surgery. Originally shooting was starting at 10 a.m. which meant I was going to have to miss out, which disappointed me more than I had words for, but Carrington worked a miracle, and the Video and Broadcast Manager, Spencer, who I have worked with before was warm , compassionate and asked the most revealing of questions in a sensitive way. It was like therapy, with so many long lost emotions and thoughts, and many more recent ones, seeing the light of day (I broke down a little talking about my gorgeous guy), and I was exhausted afterwards but the thrill of being a part of something so life-changing as this overrode it all, and I walked out of campus for the train feeling 100 metres high.

.... and thankfully the tooth wasn't infected this time, the endodentist was able to finish everything off and all I need is a cap which will be done on Monday 29 August! So glad that's all over! (Fun part was that my dentist, who's a friend, and gay too, got an email from the endodentist, Torsten, that showed more than a dentist/client interest in me.....very flattering)

Up to date and interesting magazines in the rack? Surely not!

The exit from the dentists' office. Even with a numbed up drooling mouth, this was a happy walk!